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Post by Yoruichi Shihoin on May 13, 2015 15:56:11 GMT -6
"Girl Talk":
After a long, hot shower, Yoruichi stepped outside the shop to find Kita sitting on the step, watching Kenji and Soji playing. Apparently they were playing two person tag, and Kenji was letting the two year old win, given that not only was there a five year gap between them, but Kenji was also much faster than the half shinigami younger boy. Yoruichi nodded and smiled, pleased. Kenji turned and spotted his mother as Soji jumped on the elder boy, wanting a piggy back ride. He pouted at his mom as if saying, "I don't want to carry this kid." Yoruichi waved it off, wordlessly saying, "endure it." Kenji sighed and squatted down so Soji could jump on his back.
Kita, looked behind her to see who Kenji was soundlessly conversing with and found Yoruichi moving to sit down next to her.
"They grow like weeds," Yoruichi smiled. |
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Post by Kita Miyamoto on May 13, 2015 16:05:14 GMT -6
Kita nodded silently as she looked back out at the two young boys playing. Her hand coming up as she rested her head to her palm, one elbow propped to her knee, her other arm resting across her lap. A large yawn then escaped her.
"All done helping Tessai out?" Kita asked Yoruichi.
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Post by Yoruichi Shihoin on May 13, 2015 16:22:17 GMT -6
"Yes, finally. Why he suddenly decided the ENTIRE shop needed cleaning, I have no idea," Yoruichi sighed in relief and leaned back, putting her arms behind her head. She smiled up at Kita. "You look more tired than I feel, though." |
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Post by Kita Miyamoto on May 13, 2015 16:37:40 GMT -6
Giggling softly Kita nodded, "I feel drained. Sleep still does not come easy even after talking to Kisuke about all the hell in Las Noches. Sometimes I think I need a shrink, but then when I tell him my story he will surly lock me up. Hell I still can't believe half of what I have seen and lived through."
Hearing Sojiro squeal Kita quickly looked his way. Kenji was still giving him a piggyback ride and he was bouncing around like a bucking bronco.
"Easy there Kenji. He is still little." Kita told him.
"I won't hurt him Nee-chan." Kenji called back to her.
Kita smiled shaking her head as she looked back to Yoruichi. "That's the one that amazes me. Yesterday while training with Kisuke he wanted to train me while I was training with Vacanze. Kisuke tried to explain to him he was not ready for that yet and he insistence he was big enough."
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Post by Yoruichi Shihoin on May 13, 2015 16:56:09 GMT -6
Yoruichi nodded and grinned. "Still though. Getting his Zanpakuto at six years of age. That's... unheard of. He's probably going to have Bankai before he's twenty. That... scares me. Especially with the kind of people out there that would kill for the kind of power he's blessed with. And with each time he gets stronger, I have to get stronger as well. I'm his mother and it's my duty to protect him. I won't let anyone touch him until he's strong enough to defend himself. Even after that happens, though, I'll still protect him."
She sat up and watched the two playing. Soji had now forced Kenji to the ground and was making him carry him on his back like a horse. Soji laughed and kicked his legs, holding on to parts of Kenji's hair like reins. Yoruichi laughed as Kenji started to look more exhausted than the two mothers put together.
"And then there's Sojiro. He just might turn out to be even more talented than Kenji. We'll have to look out for both of them collectively." |
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Post by Kita Miyamoto on May 13, 2015 18:46:51 GMT -6
Kita hummed agreeing with Yoruichi as she watched the boys play. A long sorrowful sigh slipped from Kita, causing Yoruichi to look her way again.
Yoruichi poked her in the side. "Alright, spill the beans. Tell me what's bothering you, before the kids see. Soji is still too young to see his momma upset. You need to be at your best mentally for him, so come on. What's wrong?"
She looked to Yoruichi, "it's going on three years since we have returned from Las Noches and don't get me wrong. I love you guys like family, but... I feel like I am intruding. I want to move out, but I don't want to leave Gin. Then again..." she sighed again. "I am worried about my nightmares and if I wake screaming like I have in the past. I know I have a place to move to. My parents house sine it was left to me in their death," she shook her head. "But..." she looked to her feet as a tear trickled down her cheek. "Can I bring myself to live there alone knowing that is were they died." She looked quickly to Yoruichi.
"I want Gin to wake up in the worst way. I know Raeline said he would wake soon no later then ten years would he be in this coma." More tears fell as her head shook again. "Can I make it that long without him? I miss him so much"
She sniffled and covered her face with her hands quickly drying her tears before the boys saw her crying. "I just don't know Yoruichi."
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Post by Yoruichi Shihoin on May 13, 2015 19:19:29 GMT -6
Yoruichi pulled her into an embrace, smoothing her hair back. "You're not intruding, Kita. You belong here. You always have, and always will. Don't feel like you have to move out. And what happened to you in Las Noches won't go away easily or quickly, but we're all here to help you. And if you moved out, if you did wake up screaming, wouldn't you be more scared waking up with no one else there to comfort you? It would be much scarier waking up alone in your parents house where they were killed than waking up here where you're surrounded by friends and family."
Yoruichi kissed the top of her head. "And while Ichimaru may not be with you, we're here to help you. You're not alone just because he's not here. I know that's how it was back then, but that's not true any more. When he's not here, we are. All of us. Even your friends in Soul Society. And while some would rather dig an early grave for Ichimaru, we all know what him being in a coma does to you. We're here to help you, Kita." |
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Post by Kita Miyamoto on May 13, 2015 19:27:13 GMT -6
She continued to wipe her eyes, "Vacanze thought training would help me relax and relieve some of my stress, but sometimes when we are training I get flashbacks of training with Aizen. It scares me because I am afraid I might snap and start fighting the one I am training with." She pulled back from the embrace and looked to Yoruichi.
"I am sure if I did Sumi would pull her powers back and you guys could stop me quickly and easily, but there is always the chance I could get one good hit in and hurt someone badly."
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Post by Yoruichi Shihoin on May 13, 2015 19:32:54 GMT -6
Yoruichi nodded in understanding. "But then, Vacanze is there for you too. I'm sure he can take whatever you can dish out. He cares about you too much to let you suffer or hurt yourself or your loved ones. He's strong enough for both of you during that time. And if you need to let things out through sparring, Vacanze would be the perfect person to let it out on physically. I know you don't like the sound of that, but he's an arrancar. He can take more beatings than any of us and live through it. I'm sure he still wants to continue to make amends for what things have happened there, especially to you. He would love the chance to help you in any way, no matter in what way."
Yoruichi pushed a lock of hair behind her ear. "We need to find you a safe outlet too. Something that won't provoke bad memories. Something that has nothing to do with Aizen or Las Noches." |
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Post by Kita Miyamoto on May 13, 2015 20:03:37 GMT -6
"Work..." Kita replied. "So far only being at work helps. And if Karin comes around not even being at work helps." She looked back out at the boys as they were not sitting and playing marbles.
"Everywhere I look..." a tear streamed down her cheek, "even Sojiro reminds me of Las Noches. Even escaping the hell I never really escaped it."
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Post by Yoruichi Shihoin on May 13, 2015 20:22:00 GMT -6
Yoruichi nodded, but then pinched Kita's arm. "Don't think like that. Sojiro is a symbol of your survival. If you hadn't survived all that, he wouldn't be here. Same goes for Karin. Her being here means she survived and became stronger. Everyone who was there that came back alive is a symbol of our survival. Especially you, who endured the worst of it. You faced everything Aizen threw at you and the rest of us and survived it all. With all your strength and courage, you beat Aizen and came back alive. Ichimaru, too. He may not be in good shape right now, but he's alive. He may be in a coma, but he's not dead. He will wake up. He just needs more time to truly come back from all of that."
She then pinched Kita again and narrowed her eyes at her. "And working yourself sick won't do anything either. Even if that's the only place that's safe for you, overworking yourself isn't the way to deal with this. You're strong and you have courage. You survived Aizen's games, so I know that you have the power to face your demons. These nightmares, the flashbacks, your fear, everything. None of those should compare to the real thing, the prolonged suffering via Aizen. If you can survive that, you can beat your demons. I know you can. We all know you can. So if there's nothing else that helps, face things head on. That's the only way things will get better. Face your fears, beat them, and come out on top." |
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Post by Kita Miyamoto on May 13, 2015 20:30:34 GMT -6
Kita giggled softly from behind her tears as she rubbed her arm. "I am trying. I am, but it seems like when I start to see the light at the end of the tunnel something new crashes down on top of me and knocks be back where the light is not visible any longer." She sighed.
"When I look at Sojiro he reminds me of Las Noches, but in a good way. He was created during mine and Gin's freedom from Aizen. A time I cherish very much." She smiled warmly looking at Sojiro. "He looks so much like his father."
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Post by Yoruichi Shihoin on May 13, 2015 20:41:14 GMT -6
Yoruichi nodded with a smile and turned to look at Kenji and Sojiro. "There were many times when I thought I wouldn't make it. When I found out I was pregnant, I was afraid. I almost didn't want to have him, not because I wasn't ready, but for his sake. I didn't want Aizen to get a hold of him. But Kisuke was there to talk me through it. He made plans. He prepared and prepared and even his backups had backups. He made damn sure that Aizen wouldn't find or get his hands on Kenji. Then, after he was born, I was even more scared because now he was in the world, ripe for Aizen's taking. For the longest time, I wouldn't leave the village, even when I had to. I would just hold him and watch him sleep. There were times I felt that no matter what we did, we couldn't protect him. Aizen would find him and tear him from us and we wouldn't be able to do anything. There were many nights where I couldn't sleep because if I did, all I saw was Kenji being taken from me and Kisuke."
She smiled and looked up at the sky. "Finally, I found a way to beat that fear. Whenever I felt afraid, I would hug Kenji. I would hold him until we both fell asleep. And when I held him, I realized that Aizen hadn't found him. He hadn't taken him away from us. He was still there with me. Remembering that he was there in my arms made me realize that we had succeeded so far, and it gave me hope." Yoruichi turned to smile at Kita. "Maybe the same will help you. Or at least something similar. Find something that gives you hope and brings the light back, and when the darkness pops up again, do that thing, whether it's hugging Soji or whatever else." |
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Post by Kita Miyamoto on May 13, 2015 21:09:52 GMT -6
Kita then turned and looked at her. "And then I came into the picture. You were barely pregnant with Kenji." She looked to Yoruichi. "I am sure you knew. You knew what I was before I even knew. I know Kisuke would have told you... Didn't it make you hate me? Didn't it make you mad that Kisuke was willing to protect me? Knowing that if Aizen found me he would in time find Kenji or found us at the same time?"
Yoruichi held a look of shock on her face with her question as Kita shook her head. "I would have." She looked away from Yoruichi. "I would have hated me. I didn't ask for this. I never wanted to put the one's I love into danger. I never wanted to hurt them. I ripped Tsukiro's heart out. Not just once but twice. Poor Vacanze. He and I were together in Las Noches and he ended up falling for me. I am sure he holds some animosity toward me and Gin." She shook her head.
"I don't know what kept that man from choking the life out of me. I was a royal pain in his ass. The beatings he took for me to keep me safe. The blame and how did I repay him?" She looked to Yoruichi then back to the boys.
"By running away. By not listening to him and causing more trouble for him. Sometimes I wish Izuru were not there that day Gin almost beat me to death. Then maybe everyone would not have suffered so much in my stead."
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Post by Yoruichi Shihoin on May 13, 2015 21:18:02 GMT -6
Yoruichi sighed and narrowed her eyes. She made her hands into fists and raised them to Kita's head, grounding her knuckles into Kita's temples. "Stop. Talking. Like. That." Then she pinched her cheeks. "I never hated you. EVER. No one does. And the things that happened as a result of you being the seraph were not your fault. Not what happened with you and Tsukiro, nor you and Gin, nor anything else. It's Aizen's fault, plain and simple. His malice, his greed, his thirst for power, those were the reasons this happen. Aizen is the one who caused all this. If not for him, you being the seraph never would have meant a thing. You never would have known and everything would be peachy. But that doesn't make this your fault. You couldn't control any of this. And if Gin hated you for being a pain, he wouldn't have fell for you. As for Tsukiro, he's a big boy now. He'll get over it. And if he doesn't I'll knock him around until he starts thinking sense. And if anyone out there hates you for things you haven't done and couldn't control, I'll beat 'em stupid."
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