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Post by Sojiro Ichimaru on Jul 25, 2016 21:32:20 GMT -6
"Depression":It wasn't right. And though he knew better, Sojiro really found it difficult to believe that things wouldn't get worse. His mother was gone. Riku was being an ass, avoiding him and not telling him why. His father was still in a coma. And now... "Kisuke, what are you doing here? Is mom-"
Kisuke raised a hand. "We're still looking, Soji. I'll tell you when I know more." He paused. "Sit down please. I have to tell you something and you can't just speak about it to anyone..." He sighed, lowering his hat over his eyes "It will be devastating. But you deserve to know." Sojiro felt his stomach drop with the first statement. Take-jii and Kyoraku were dead, killed by Sada. It wasn't possible. Soul Society needed them. He still needed to learn more from them. They were too strong and too good to be dead. First, he couldn't speak, but when his uncle's tone didn't change and the serious depth of his gaze only sharpened, reality took a hold of him.Then, he was angry, screaming and cussing and throwing things around his room. Some things Kisuke let him destroy. Others he caught with kido spells. But after a few moments, his rage cooled into icy fury.Sojiro Ichimaru demanded the details, but when he got them, they didn't help. He went back to denying it, trying to push away the creeping sorrow pricking at his eyes and heart. Even his head. Then Kisuke had to leave. Telling him to take a couple days off and that they would check on him if they had a chance.Sojiro hadn't replied.He couldn't. Mitsuo's taunts from Karakura and the threat from Aizen threatened to send him spiraling again. Instead, he just buried his head in his hands and breathed. Choking down the tears, hands tight in his hair. He didn't eat dinner. Or breakfast.Now at noon, he picked at some cereal from home.... if home would survive this. He swung his fist into the wall again, leaving another dent in the surface. It wasn't enough. He laid his head against the wall. It wasn't enough what he could do now. Meanwhile: "Mourning": | "Moving Forward":
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Post by Makino Tori on Jul 25, 2016 22:03:13 GMT -6
Not seeing Sojiro in his morning classes Makino worried. She knew something was up with the energy floating around the Soul Society, but she did not know what. She just knew it had to be bad when Captain Kuchiki did not show for his morning class as well. What was going on and why was all this bad energy moving around the place.
Finally, lunch came and she made her way to Sojiro and Riku's dorm room. She could feel Sojiro inside the room. His energy heavy, saddened and very defeated. Her head tipped to one side in confusion as her hand lifted and she knocked on the door. Nothing from within the room. She knocked again. She heard a noise.
"Soji-kun?" She called to him. She heard the noise again. "Soji-kun, are you alright?"
"Go away. I don't want to talk to anyone." His soft hurt voice called back to her.
"Soji-kun. Please. I only want to help. If there is somethi--"
"I SAID GO AWAY! THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO! SO JUST GO AWAY!!"
Makino sighed, the flat of her hand now resting to the door as she hung her head. "Soji-kun..." Her tone now saddened as well.
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Post by Sojiro Ichimaru on Jul 25, 2016 22:42:13 GMT -6
Sojiro lifted his head as he heard her slide to the floor. He clenched his teeth and pulled a hand through his hair, trying to calm some of the oppressive reiatsu he was letting out. "You have classes, Maki. And more homework," he muttered. "Worry about that."
"But Soji-"
He slammed his fist into the wall again. "DAMN IT MAKI! GET OUT OF HERE! I'M NOT A CHILD!" He slid down, hissing as his bleeding knuckles scraped against the wall.
"This is my burden. and my loss. Not yours. Go be normal!" He shook his head as a few more tears escaped his attempt to keep them back. "Stop it," he berated himself. "You got through Las Noches. You got through your mother being raped, father nearly being killed. This is just another fucking test from him!"
His rage boiled again and he threw a chair across the room.
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Post by Makino Tori on Jul 25, 2016 23:06:10 GMT -6
Her hands clenched at her kimono hearing the pain in his voice. What happened? Why was he being like this? And why was he belittling himself. She jumped as a surge of his reiatsu washed over her through the closed door and a loud crash rang out in the room.
"SOJIRO!" She screamed through the door, fear now racing through her veins as both hands that were flat against the door balled into fists and she pounded on the door with one of them. "SOJIRO!!" SOJIRO ARE YOU ALRIGHT?!" There was no answer from him. "ANSWER ME! PLEASE!!"
She had never felt such power flow from the boy on the other side of the door. This power? It was unnatural for one as young as him and being half human. What was he? And why did he have himself locked behind his door?
A tear rolled down her cheek at the thought of him being in there alone; dealing with whatever it was that had ripped him apart so badly. "Sojiro..." her soft whimpers called to him. "Please let me help you." Her head fell to the door as she still rested to the floor in front of it. "Please..."
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Post by Sojiro Ichimaru on Jul 26, 2016 8:46:35 GMT -6
Sojiro fell back to the sofa, violet eyes wet as he looked to a vase that had fallen from its pedestal at his dangerous rage. Even if he had thrown the chair in the other direction. The turquoise glass had broken down the middle. Probably the third thing he’d broken of Riku’s since he had heard the news. At least Kadaj could put it back together…. if he saw him again.
Running a hand through his hair, he rose, pushing aside the bent chair and walked over to the door, glass crunching under his feet. He hesitated and then unlocked it, pulling the door open just enough for her to see into the room. “Do what you want,” he murmured. “But watch your step. I have to clean up.”
His eyes were sparking with a warning scarcely held back but his cheeks were damp and salty. Blood was sticking in his hair and splashed against his clothes. Probably from his bloody knuckles. Sojiro looked at her for one moment before turning back into the room.
“Close and lock it,” he intoned, bending down to pick up the vase.
But when he got down, he couldn’t get up again. “Damn it!” he hissed. “Why now? Why after everything did the gods…” He bowed his head, hands tightening into fists again.
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Post by Makino Tori on Jul 26, 2016 13:13:27 GMT -6
Makino sighed inwardly as she stepped around Sojiro and squatted down in front of him. Lifting her hand she brushed his sliver damp bangs from his face. "Whatever happened...I am here for you to talk to. After all, that's what friends are for, right?"
She let her hand now rest to his shoulder as both hands then took a hold of him and helped him stand. "Go sit on the couch, Soji-kun. I am going to make you some soothing tea to help you calm down some, and then I will get to cleaning up." She helped him to the couch as he sat down. He then looked up at her with a blank expression.
She looked deep into his violet eyes and smiled warmly at him. "You don't have to tell me anything unless you want to. For now just know I am here if you need me." She reached out brushing his sliver bangs back once more. "Alright?"
He nodded slowly hanging his head once more as she turned and went toward the kitchen. It was no time and she was back with a nice smooth soothing aroma of a cup of hot tea. She only brought out his cup and the teapot and sat it on the table in front of him. A small plate of cookies she had found in the cabinet also accompanied them.
"Please enjoy them. I will be right here."
She then went to work on the destroyed room. The silence was unbearable. Almost like the silence between two people that just got into a major fight and neither wanted to admit they were wrong, but Makino worked through it.
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Post by Sojiro Ichimaru on Jul 26, 2016 14:05:34 GMT -6
For a while, Soji just let her work, hands over his cup of tea, stable enough that Daichi came out from his hiding spot and started to lick at the wounds on his hands. The demigod remained silent too. Still offering no words, no response to his questions. The presence was still there in his mind, but there was no words to go with it. He sighed again. He didn’t want to have to work through this alone. But he didn’t want to burden anyone else with the stark truth. It was good to be ignorant sometimes.
He glanced up as the glass echoed in broken chimes as Maki started sweeping the floor. “If you could, put the figurine, the vase, and the picture in a box. I’ll get them fixed.” He looked down again. “Later.”
Soji took a sip of the tea, smiling for a moment at the flavor before his frown returned again. His favorite tea was still the mint and jasmine tea his uncle made. He set it down, ignoring the cookies and rolled onto his side, facing the couch. Listening to Maki work.
He closed his eyes.
And started speaking.
“My dad was in a coma until my eighth birthday. Mom… couldn’t decide whether to cry or smile about him. I think she worried he wouldn’t return…. even after the angel helped him. He’d been gone for so long… nearly a decade. I never got to see her cry too long. Someone would take me into the next room once I got worried…. Tsuki, Kisuke, V, and-” His throat closed up again. He hunched his shoulders. "They were like second fathers to me. I mean, K-” He growled and punched the arm of the couch, his reiatsu spiking again. Daichi chirped at him and he pulled it back inside of him, swallowing thickly. “The Gotei are leaders to you guys… heroes… but to me, a lot of them we- are family. And with mom gone…”
He stopped again, until his stomach growled. "Ignore that," he muttered. "And go when you're done."
He wasn't going to talk about this after all.
Dad wouldn't.
And where was he?
Soji took another breath. ".... ignore me. You... can stick around."
Another tear was forming in his eye. "They were great people....They wouldn't give up... they- Damn it!"
He sprang up again. "IF YOU'RE GOING TO TELL ME NOTHING, THEN GO AWAY!" he screamed. Daichi leapt onto Maki's shoulder. Soji slumped to the floor next to the sofa.
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Post by Makino Tori on Jul 26, 2016 14:46:37 GMT -6
Makino started at the ferret as it landed on her shoulder. Where did it come from and was Sojiro yelling at her to tell him something or the ferret? She shook her head then looked back to Sojiro as he stood in front of the couch then fell back like he was a rag doll.
"Soji-kun. Were you...talking to me?" She looked to the ferret on her shoulder again. He had to be. Animals do not talk. She turned back to her friend and walked toward him.
"I am sorry. I...I did not know all that." She sat down on the edge of the couch where he was laying her hand softly resting to his side. "Continue. Please. You have my full attention now."
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Post by Sojiro Ichimaru on Jul 26, 2016 15:10:17 GMT -6
Soji shook his head, bleary eyes watching Daichi swing down and run into the shadows of the room. “I don’t know what you’re doing with me sometimes,” he grumbled. “You stop me when I want to do something to get stronger. And then say nothing when my world is wrenched out beneath me.” He turned his head away from the ferret, not really hearing Makino’s words to him. “And if Sumi protected us, why are we so broken now? Why didn’t the Soul King protect Take-” He growled lowly, hiding his head. “It’s not right. He wasn’t supposed to go now. I’m not ready to kill Aizen yet. I can’t take Kyo’s place…”
His bloody hand clenched. "But I can't let him win this game...."
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Post by Makino Tori on Jul 26, 2016 16:20:51 GMT -6
Makino blinked a few times and looked the direction the ferret ran off. He was talking to the ferret. He had to be. She had no idea what he was talking about and Sojiro was far from mad. "Soji-kun? Can you...can you talk to animals? What place are you talking about and who is Kyo?"
"He's not just any animal..." he replied distractedly.
"O-kay," Makino replied then sighed heavily as she stood up from the couches edge. "That's one questions down." She mumbled softly. "I am going to finish cleaning then fix you something to eat. I am sure you have had nothing decent all day." She lifted the broom from its resting place and started sweeping again.
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Post by Riku Asuhara on Jul 26, 2016 17:21:57 GMT -6
The door clicked as it unlocked and slowly it opened, revealing a dejected looking Riku. His hair appeared windswept, even though it was pulled into a pony tail. He carried bags filled to the brims with covered items. His kimono was pale blue with dark blue around the collar, sleeves and the bottom at an angle, and golden shaped teardrop patterns. He had just set down the four bags he carried when he looked up. Seeing Sojiro and Makino, he froze, his eyes wide. For a split second, he retreated back into the hallway, however, Sojiro's depressed aura kept him from leaving.
"Wh-what's going on? What happened?"
Why is Sojiro-kun so upset?
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Post by Makino Tori on Jul 26, 2016 17:35:52 GMT -6
Makino looked quickly Riku's way when he spoke, her head shaking slightly. "I don't know. He keep talking about a lot of different things but not making any sense. He talked to me a little bit but it was about when he was a child." She looked Sojiro's way again.
"I don't know if something happened to his parents or his little brother or if it even has anything to do with them. I don't know." She looked back to Riku stepping over to him taking the bags from him.
Riku watched her as she stepped back from him with the bags. "Could you put those in my room please." Makino nodded as Riku turned his attention back to his best friend.
"Go talk to him. You're his best friend. Maybe you can get something out of him." Makino told him as she left the main room for Riku's room to put the bags there.
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Post by Riku Asuhara on Jul 26, 2016 17:47:12 GMT -6
Riku sat down on the couch next to Sojiro and took the hand that was bleeding. He put his hand over his knuckles and a green light flashed. Slowly the wounds began to heal. He watched in concentration as he spoke to his best friend.
"Soji-kun, please tell me what's wrong. You know I don't like seeing you like this. You don't have to go into details. Just... say something."
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Post by Sojiro Ichimaru on Jul 26, 2016 20:40:00 GMT -6
"Are you sure you want to do that?" Sojiro muttered.
"Want? Of course I want to know why-"
Sojiro's eyes flashed as he looked up at Rku. "Are you sure you want to actually talk to me?!" Sojiro snapped. He pushed off the floor, eyes still locked on his best friend. "You picked a hell of a time to be a moody asshole, Asuhara! Days after my mother vanishes- after that horrendous fight you witnessed- and taking my baby brother with her, you think you can just play the cold shoulder and everything will be fine." His hands clenched, his aura spiked, bringing Daichi out from his hiding place, and Sojiro threw the lukewarm cup of tea at the wall behind Riku. "WELL IT'S NOT!" he screamed, "AND I AM DONE WITH MY ROLE IN IT!"
"Role?" Maki asked as Riku struggled to speak.
"I am tired of being strong. Of silently waiting and believing it will work out. That my mom will come back to my dad. Who is awesome but also very torn up. Who was gone eight years of my life, and then they dragged me to Las Noches, and chess games got too real. All because of a stupid power which nearly wasn't enough to stop my mother from killing herself trying to save my father, and a bastard's vendetta with my family and his obsession with winning. Dad ripped out his heart. So he'll hurt mom. Unless I can kill him this time.... But I am not ready."
"And everyone including a damn demigod likes to remind me that when I try to do something about it! I'm not ready..." He shook his head and turned away. "I get friends. Mom runs away. I can't follow her. Friends won't speak to me...and I can't protect either of them like that. And then..." his voice lowered, "Take-jii and Kyo are massacred."
"The world's crumbling and I'm just another person lost in it."
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Post by Riku Asuhara on Jul 26, 2016 21:48:23 GMT -6
Riku shrank back into the couch with each of Sojiro's words. He was mad at him. Sojiro was mad at him. This was his fault. If he had been there for him like he always had been instead of sulking, he'd be a lot better off right now. He was being selfish and self-centered and jealous over something he couldn't have in the first place. And now his best friend, the first person who accepted him, was angry with him.
His eyes burned and shortly after his cheeks felt wet. He gaped up at Sojiro, one of his hands clenching the tea soaked couch cushion. "I... I'm sorry. I didn't know. You seemed okay with Makino around so I thought... I just... I should have been here, and I'm so sorry. Please don't be mad at me. Please. I'm sorry."
The dam broke and everything from the past few days came pouring out. His loneliness, his disappointment and anger over his career, and now his family's harsh words over his choice to quit the family tradition. Everything was so jumbled up in his head, he didn't even know why he was crying anymore. And the thought that he must have looked so pathetic and pitiful at that moment just made everything worse.
"I'm sorry..." He folded over, his face buried in his hands.
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