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Post by Captain Juushiro Ukitake on Sept 23, 2015 13:53:25 GMT -6
“A long time ago,” the captain replied, keeping his eyes on her exploring fingers, and though he saw the faint tremor quickly halted, he didn’t comment on it. If he pressed too far, she would react by keeping him completely out. He waited another moment before offering her a reply. “You made it for me after I started helping you with your kido lessons.”
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Post by Yumiko Ryouma on Sept 23, 2015 14:08:52 GMT -6
“No…” Yumiko murmured, tracing the pattern yet again and finally remembering why she had attempted to do blind. “It wasn’t for that.” She lowered her head, a tear slipping down onto the fabric. “You gave me something to cling to in the dark. You… it was you who worked through the seals and unlocked Sazanami for me. That….” she halted, breathing harshly, “gave me enough light in the darkness.”
She bowed her head. “I can’t believe I forgot.”
Suddenly, flame flickered through her eyes. She crunched up as a voice whispered in her head.
“Ryouma, chaos will always be his answer. Hate will always be yours."
“Shut up,” Yumiko hissed. “It’s not… it’s not…”
Her own words echoed back at her.
“Even without my memories, they'd done enough. It… would be another drop in the darkness.”
“No, no, no. NO!” Yumiko screamed. “I am not going down that path. “I am not. I won’t.”
“In time, Yumiko Ryouma,” Vale’s voice murmured, making her hand hurt even more. “In time. I hold in my hand a weapon to tear the Soul Society apart.”
“GET AWAY FROM ME!” Yumiko hollered, her reiatsu whipping around her as she clutched her head.
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Post by Captain Juushiro Ukitake on Sept 23, 2015 16:45:29 GMT -6
“Yumiko!” Juushiro cried out, grabbing her hand still clutching the bookmark, “Yumiko, calm down. No one is here now but me and you!” He threw out his reiatsu just enough to keep her from hurting herself or anything else.
Yumiko shook her head, even as her panic stilled as the net of familiar energy wrapped around her. “He’s - they’re always there,” she whimpered. “Someone’s always there… to bring out the darkness… and pain. And then there’s….”
The door slammed open, and Yumiko jolted, Kido wrapping around her form. “Get away, VALE! You’ve taken enough!”
As the bolt leapt from her towards the door, Juushiro released Kotowari and slowly neutralized it. His larger hand over both of Yumiko’s, he sent out a wave of calm. “It’s alright, Tessai,” he called over, voice low. “I have this under control.”
“Are you sure?” the older man asked.
Juushiro nodded as Yumiko trembled in his grasp. “Kotowari won’t let anyone harm anyone today.” Releasing his zanpakuto, he stroked his student’s dampening hair aside. Tessai left the room again. “It’s alright.”
Still crying, Yumiko took a harsh breath of air and tried to pull back. He let her go but kept Kotowari wrapped around her humming reiatsu. He stroked her hand. “You don’t have to fear falling, Yumiko.” She stiffened, still looking down. The captain continued. “Darkness or pain, you’ve already conquered them many times.”
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Post by Yumiko Ryouma on Sept 24, 2015 10:35:04 GMT -6
Yumiko closed her eyes, trying to stem the flow of scorching pain from the echoes of memories, from the fleeting snatches of fire to vermillion sheens and dark oblivion threatening her vision. She heard her mentor’s words as if from a distance and shook her head at his faith in her. “It’s not the same,” she whispered, voice hoarse. “It’s not. And he - he still has Mizue.”
That was enough of the truth.
Ukitake squeezed her hand. She smiled in turn. For a moment. And then looked to the bookmark still in her hand. More tears started stinging her eyelids.
She took another breath.
“I didn’t want to lose anything else. I thought that resolution would be enough…. to walk with him.” She wrapped her arms around herself. “After all the manipulation around me, from Aizen, from my family and Central, from Alister, I thought he could be the one place I would be at peace.... But….”
“I’ve owned you since the moment I laid eyes on you.”
“You are a shadow cast over me so that I may dwell in the dark peacefully…. The disaster that leads to chaos.”
Yumiko lowered her head into her hands as the words from that dark night poured over her yet again. “My memories are so torn up, by my own pain and denial, the ever-present darkness, my need to belong, and by others’ trying to control me. I don’t know who I want to be anymore. I’m even terrified of Mizue now, and she’s never abandoned me. But… he … I don’t want to be a weapon.”
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Post by Captain Juushiro Ukitake on Sept 24, 2015 12:07:59 GMT -6
Juushiro hesitated and then pulled her into his arms. This time, she didn’t resist, just lay against him, swallowing against more crying. He kept his grip gentle, letting his connection with his zanpakuto spirit soothe his anger for the moment. He would face that later. Stroking her hair, he thought on her words. “Yumiko… did Alister unleash your memories that day Vale froze time in Kyo-”
She was already nodding. “And then…. he took them back…. leaving their imbedded effect on me behind at an even stronger level.”
Kotowari sent a wave of cool wind through his mind, taking another spike of rage into himself. Thanking his partners, he focused back on his ward. “When?” he asked.
“… They were gone when I woke up from escaping Las Noches,” she admitted thickly.
Juushiro held her closer. “Yumiko…”
She ducked her head against his chest, silent for a moment before clenching the cloth beneath her and whispering. “We will do this everyday until you learn and accept who you truly are.”
Juushiro’s eyes narrowed. “Who said that?”
“Vale…. the day he… he hurt me…. as my energy started fading from fighting….” She faltered again. “I tasted my own blood in his kiss that day…. when I… started to…”
Surrender.
Juushiro closed his eyes. “Thank you for telling me.” He fell silent, considering her words and how to respond to them. How to best comfort her without disguising the truth with gentle words.
But he didn’t want to make her pain worse, either.
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Post by Yumiko Ryouma on Sept 24, 2015 12:55:02 GMT -6
Yumiko took another breath and pulled back from the calming embrace. She had already started to speak. She didn’t have the heart to stop. “Ukitake?”
“Yes?” he murmured.
“Vale…” She hesitated, knowing she had to ask…. but scared to continue. She lowered her head, wishing for the chiming presence of Mizue, and took a breath once more. She raised her head and spoke on. “He said he still loves me…. even with the way….. I started fighting when things turned dark in Las Noches.” Her teacher’s eyes hardened, just slightly. She looked at the rose that fallen in her panic. “I’m scared what he will become if-” She shook her head. “now that I won’t return to his side.”
Her throat felt like lead and her heart pounded sluggishly, like a great weight attempting to stay afloat in a lake.
She turned back to her teacher. “Ukitake, did I - was it my actions that ruined our love or was it never true - just a dream I clung to - to - to escape the pain? Did Aizen break me?”
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Post by Captain Juushiro Ukitake on Sept 25, 2015 14:46:39 GMT -6
“Don’t ever think that, Yumiko,” Juushiro replied quickly, taking her hand again. “You’ve never given up hope have you?” he continued, voice gentling.
“No,” she murmured, looking down again.
“If either Vale or Sousuke had broken you, you would have lost that part of yourself. And you never would have been able to attempt your escape and rescue mission.” As she stayed silent, the captain hesitated and then squeezed her hand. “Yumiko sometimes hope is painful because it’s a fight important to who you are.”
“What if it is too important to me?”
“Hope?” he asked. She nodded. He stroked her hand. “Explain.”
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Post by Yumiko Ryouma on Sept 25, 2015 15:32:05 GMT -6
She sighed. “I hoped if I found a home that I wouldn’t miss my family, miss what I lost with Yukishiro. I hoped if I found happiness that Central would stop trying to use me. And….” she glanced into her lap, “I hoped that my love for Vale would keep Alister at bay…. as well as the darkness he first showed me when he tried to take me the first time in Las Noches…. when I hit him…. and he twisted the second chance, the trust I had given him.”
“There is no amount of kindness lurking in my soul. No small amount of anything that would resemble a heart. So, do not fool yourself, Yumiko. You are here, in my bedroom, because you want to be….”
“Even if you do mean something to me, the necessary evil this place breeds is still a part of me,” she whispered.
Ukitake stayed quiet, listening.
“I hoped I could be like Kita and support Vale as he was, and yet…” she glanced up, meeting the warm eyes of her mentor, “his darkness worries me. It always has. Because… Vale’s drawn out my own…”
She lowered her head once more. “He’s caused me to black out twice. I…. remember the blood on my hands after the second time. And glimpses remain from what Alister restored. Of a crimson curtain…. And there's more." She twisted, turning away, and Ukitake let her. She took a breath, looking towards the window. “Vale and I fought…. in the Dune Sea… in order to trap Gin… before he started changing. I wounded his arm and Chinmoku tore into my face and eyes.” A lock of hair fell into her face. She pushed it back. “Sumi came, healed me, and I won that fight…. And I …. enjoyed it.”
She turned back around. “What if I was hoping that a home would bury a wish for revenge? A wish for revenge to stop all the pain? And that wish keeps whispering in the back of my mind?!”
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Post by Captain Juushiro Ukitake on Sept 30, 2015 16:58:12 GMT -6
Vale Tervaden, it wasn’t enough that you escaped death by my hand, when you return to cast a shadow on Soul Society, your reach extends to one of the people I hold most dear. But it is done. You may have chosen the darkness again, even after your second chance, but you will not dye Yumiko in the same forsaken colors.
Juushiro brushed at her cheeks, wiping away her fresh lines of tears, as he let her calm a moment before attempting to ease her heart. “Your purity of heart called to Tervaden’s loneliness, his broken identity, and his confidence covered the open wounds left by the darkness of your memory, your abandonment. That doesn’t mean it was wrong.”
“All of us love in a different way, Yumiko, with each special person we meet.” He lowered his hand to his kimono, pulling out a piece of chocolate. His ward accepted it with a weak smile. The captain continued. “I, myself, may not have found ‘the’ woman to share my life with, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t seen many types of love over the centuries of my life. I can tell the difference between love and an infatuation or seduction.” He paused, watching her eyes fall to the bookmark in her hand. “Some people would say that Ichimaru’s love for Matsumoto was not the real thing because he left her alone many times. He continued to hurt her. But he chose sacrifice in order to protect her. Other people may describe Ashimitsu and Kita’s love as fleeting due her complete devotion to Ichimaru while he slept. But not all love is destined to last forever.” He took the empty wrapper from Yumiko and enfolded his hands around her own. “Sometimes questions such as these can really only be answered by the persons involved. And it can be painful. But just as we must fall many times before learning to walk, our hearts search out many experiences to help us understand and grow into our full splendor.”
Juushiro lifted Yumiko’s hand and smiled. “Everyone has light and darkness inside them. It is part of our enduring humanity. Our inheritance is the ability to choose who and what we are. And emotions such as rage and pain, even love, have long guided this personal struggle. Sometimes it is brief moments, and sometimes it is a long, drawn out journey.”
“Darkness and shadow are strong due to their beginning role in this world. The world began in darkness, but it was not the end. Your torn heart proves that you’re still struggling – that you’re still hoping for something more than the natural order of survival of the fittest. Even the fact that you have longed for love and may have searched blindly for it attests to your pull towards this side of creation.” He leaned forwards and kissed Yumiko’s forehead. “Opposites have attracted each other since the beginning, as well, Yumiko, because whether they are destined to end in peace or pieces, they did complete each other. At least something there was real,” he paused, letting her draw in another shaky breath, “even if it did die or become poison in the end.”
“You have nothing to be ashamed about, and you can begin anew."
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Post by Yumiko Ryouma on Oct 3, 2015 18:19:37 GMT -6
Yumiko closed her eyes, letting her mentor’s words sink into her harried psyche, listening and digesting their meanings in exhausted stillness. The words delved deep, soothing the aching holes in her heart. Though she still had questions. “Why couldn’t I stay with Vale if Kita could with Gin?” she whispered. “Not all love is the same,” her teacher murmured. “And not all answers are easy or there when we first need them. We have to look beyond our hurt and pain to see them.” Yumiko shook her head. “He took so much… but I - I was happy.” “I know,” Ukitake murmured, pulling her closer and holding her, “I know.” He stroked her hair. “And we will get Mizue back from him. He will not use her to bring you back.” He reached into his kimono again, slipping a ring onto her finger. “Also, this will keep Alister away. Kisuke and Vacanze started making it-” "-After the birthday disaster..." she finished. Yumiko looked down at the copper band encircling her middle finger. “I worry for him, Ukitake," she confessed. "After all he’s done and the new nightmares he’s given me, I - I still worry what Alister will turn him into. And… fear it will be my fault.” Juushiro was silent for a few minutes. Contemplating his answer. Yumiko started to pull away, worried she had said something wrong, but the captain beat her to it. “Do you want to go back?” he asked, voice carefully neutral. Yumiko shook her head, tried to speak, and lowered her head, still shaking her head. She couldn’t go back. Her hand throbbed but she just curled against her teacher. She couldn’t do it. She had to let go… Or she would lose herself for him. |
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Post by Urahara Kisuke on Nov 9, 2024 20:14:28 GMT -6
Bleach Unrated: REBOOTEDCurrent Arc: The ChaosEpisode 566 "Into the Lion's Den": (Continued) Kisuke laid her down gently on the futon, assessing her wounds more closely now—bruises, deep lacerations, and signs of unimaginable trauma. His jaw tightened. It wasn’t just the physical damage; her reiatsu was erratic, like a delicate thread on the verge of snapping.
“Tessai, I’ll need your help stabilizing her,” he said quietly, pressing his hands against her chest to channel his own energy into her, trying to steady her shattered spiritual core.
As Tessai set to work, Kisuke whispered softly, "Nemu... you’re safe here. No more orders, no more demands. Just rest." He brushed a strand of blood-matted hair away from her face, his heart heavy with anger and pity. Mayuri’s disregard for her was monstrous, an indifference so absolute it defied reason. That Nemu was forced to drag herself back from such hell alone, fighting just to keep going, spoke more of her spirit than Mayuri’s orders ever could.
When they’d finally managed to stabilize her, he sat back, watching her unconscious form. Kisuke’s voice was low, directed more at himself than anyone else. "Whatever he thought he created in you, Nemu, I can see it clearly now. He made something far stronger than he’ll ever comprehend.”--END RP-- "Depth of the Soul" |
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