Episode # 61 - The Intervention
[MUSIC PLAYS OVER THE LOUD SPEAKER]
Kisuke: *Adjusts shirt* Good morning! Today's-
Toshiro: What was that
Kisuke: What was what?
Toshiro: You adjusted yourself.
Kisuke: So?
Toshiro: And, where's your hat?
Kisuke: *Runs fingers through hair* Well...
Toshiro: Disgusting...
Kisuke: ...You're twelve. Anyway...Today's episode is brought to you by:
Matsumoto Massage Oil. I mean seriously, who doesn't want a massage from Rangiku.
Aizen: *Walks into room* Where is she?
Kisuke: *Clears throat* She isn't here yet.
Aizen: You said she would be here!
Kisuke: Don't get your panties in a bunch, Moth Man! She'll be here! Now sit down.
Aizen: Moth...Man? I, sir, am a butterfly.
Kisuke: ...Ok.
Kita: Kisuke. *Places Kisuke's hat on top his head* Thanks.
Toshiro: Hm...
Kisuke: You, zip it.
Aizen: Why...Why did you have his hat, Kita?
Kita: He let me borrow it...
Kisuke: *Clears throat* Ok, then! Kita have a seat for me. Guys, you can come in now.
Kita: What is this?
Aizen: They're here for my announcement.
Kisuke: You don't even know why you're here!
Grimmjow: Shut the fuck up and get on with it!
Kisuke: Alright. Alright. Listen. Kita...Aizen...This is an intervention. A love intervention.
Aizen: Kita! I love you!
Kita: Ugh...
Grimmjow: Shut the fuck up! Who the hell are you?! Sousuke Aizen or a fucking love sick bug?!
Aizen: ...I'm a butterfly...
Nnoitra: Gah! You're disgusting!
Aizen: Where is all this hostility coming from?
Kisuke: You're making everyone uncomfortable with all these proclamations of...love!
Aizen: No one says anything about you and Yoruichi...
Kisuke: Oh they say plenty! But, this is not about me!
Nnoitra: Can it be?! What's it like to fuck a cat?
Kisuke: I don't know. Let's ask all the women who has slept with Grimmjow. Oh wait...
Grimmjow: Shut...the...fuck...UP!
Aizen: You all are just jealous! Yes. That's it! You're jealous! All of you!
Kita: *Sighs*
Kisuke: No one is jealous of you!
Aizen: You all are!
Nnoitra: The hell I am!
Kita: *Huffs*
Aizen: I'm going...I'm going to...KITA!
Kita: *Groans*
Aizen: *Whines* Kita, they're making fun of meeeeeeeee!
Kita: AIZEN!
Aizen: Yes my, love?
Kita: ...I...
Aizen: Yes?
Kita: *Clears throat* I...I did it...
Nnoitra: *Points at Kita* PITY!
Kisuke: ...
Toshiro: ...
Aizen: Pity? What does he mean, Kita?
Kita: ...You were just so...Pretty...And...
Aizen: *Cries* But...I LOVE YOU!
Kita: ...And...I hate you all...
Yoruichi: *Walks in and drops a pair of undies on Kisuke's lap* These are yours...
Kisuke: *Smiles and clears throat* Thanks...
Nnoitra: Again...What's it like to fuck a cat?!
Grimmjow: SHUT THE HELL UP!
[TO BE CONTINUED]